Everyday is a struggle for justification

A constant desperation to host a post mortem on thought analysis

At times I am tired,

floating from heroic determination

to the delicious treat that is giving up

But to stop means to allow free pain

And I want my pain controllable.

Every day is an attempt

to string together and justify emotional havoc

Everyone is broken

but it is those who understand the concept of temporary pain

eternal death

and religious determination and spiritual condemnation

that cannot survive

And I may be one of them

But I choose to resurface.

Every day is a struggle for justification